Looking for ways to improve your sex life? Today we are joined by Certified Erotic Blueprint Coach, Laurie Love to talk about how to use the erotic blueprints for better sex and more pleasure! Join us as she shares a breakdown of the five types, the importance of thinking beyond penetrative sex, and how we can all meet our sexual needs – no sacrifice needed. 

Whether you’re single, dating, or in a relationship, there’s much pleasure to be discovered through the erotic blueprints and a lot of fun to be had! Make sure to take the in-depth quiz and tune in to this week’s fun and juicy episode.

In this week’s episode, we discuss:

[01:39] About Laurie Love

[04:50] What led Lauri to the erotic blueprints

[09:59] The five erotic blueprint types

[13:44] Using the erotic blueprints to release judgment of ourselves and each other

[15:26] The importance of feeling safe in a relationship

[20:09] Thinking beyond penetrative sex 

[22:47] Exploring our erotic blueprints with a partner or by ourselves

[25:07] The sex communication checklist

[25:42] How to meet a partner in a blueprint – there is no sacrificing needed

[31:00] The stigma around sexual satisfaction

[35:28] Healthy sex education and the erotic blueprints

[40:39] About the erotic blueprint breakthrough program

[44:04] Laurie’s favorite date

About Laurie Love

Laurie Love, Certified Erotic Blueprint Coach, brings a wealth of experience having worked with the Erotic Blueprints since their inception over 10 years ago. With a focus on overcoming frustration in relationships, Laurie empowers individuals to navigate the intricacies of intimacy, fostering a deeper connection and understanding of self and others inside and outside of relationships. Through her experience and expertise, she guides others on a journey toward enhanced sexual fulfillment and stronger, more vibrant relationships.

Laurie works with humans of all genders and sexual orientations to identify what your turn-ons and turn-offs may be through the Superpowers and Shadows of the Erotic Blueprints, which show us where we may be stuck or struggling in our sex lives and helps take the guesswork out of sex to overcome frustration and unlock sexual satisfaction. Whether you are single, dating, or in a relationship, there is much pleasure to be discovered through the Erotic Blueprints and a lot of fun to be had!

What led Lauri to the erotic blueprints

When Laurie met her partner, they hit it off from the start. Seven years later, the chemistry had died down and the spark was not there. She felt completely sexually unsatisfied even though they were having sex. She had one foot out the door and thought that she needed a new partner. Laurie had a conversation with him and then with a friend and she said that there are people out there who can help you with sexual satisfaction. Her friend then introduced her to Jaya, the founder of the erotic blueprints.

Once they started working with Jaya, they noticed that their communication and embodiment was improved. Five years from the time they started working with her, she developed the erotic blueprints. They went to a retreat with her and when Laurie heard her talk about the superpowers and shadows of each of the five erotic blueprint types – she was lit up. Finding out what their types were was a complete game changer and saved their relationship. 23 years later they are still happily together.

The five erotic blueprint types

There are five erotic blueprint types:

Energetic: These people love and need a lot of space. They love tease, anticipation, and mystery. They do not need to be touched to feel turned on and distance can turn them on. If you come on to an energetic too quickly, they will short circuit and will get turned off. They need to feel really safe, and comfortable, while having time to be in their bodies.

Sensual: These people love anything that has to do with the senses. They love gifts, the feel of clothes, and ambiance. They do tend to be in their heads more than their bodies so the environment has to be right. 

Sexual: This is the type when we think about sex. They are ready to go 0-60 and do not need foreplay. They will always focus on the orgasm as the end goal. 

Kinky: Kinky people are turned on by whatever is taboo to them. There are so many options for them from BDSM to psychological kink. 

Shapeshifter: This blueprint loves all of this and wants more of it. They have been told they are too much, too complicated, and ask for too much. 

Using the erotic blueprints to release judgment of ourselves and each other

Laurie learned that she was highly energetic and highly sensual and her partner is a sexual. He does not need any of the sensual, energetic, or kinky whereas she needs all of that. So by learning all of this, she was able to release the judgment she had against him. She started to get really resentful because she felt as if that was all he wanted to do and he was never satisfied. 

She realized that she always wanted to be a sexual but she was trying so hard to get there and felt as if something was wrong. She thought she was supposed to have the quick orgasm we have all heard about and have seen in porn. By realizing that she was not a sexual blueprint, she was able to release this shame.

The importance of feeling safe in a relationship

Laurie shares that when her partner found out that she was more turned on by hands hovering over her body than she was diving right into things, he did not understand. As they started to explore the blueprints more, he experienced what she meant. One day she asked him to hover his hands over her heart without touching her. As they were breathing together, tears started to roll down her face. She finally felt like she was being held in the way that she needed. She felt that she was enough for him and it created so much safety in her body and she finally felt like he saw her. 

They both had a lot of work to do with accepting each other but once they got to that point, they were able to appreciate each other more. From that moment on, they talked to each other differently and approached each other differently. Laurie’s nervous system was able to settle down and be calm. She shares that this part is key when you are a sensual blueprint. They need to relax before they have sex. In contrast, sexuals need to have an orgasm to relax. So these are subtle but huge differences and they learned to work together to create this safety. 

Thinking beyond penetrative sex 

Many men have been told that they are a sexual blueprint type. There was a study done where the organization found that fewer men are sexual than we realize. More men are actually energetic and sensual. They end up wearing this mask of being a sexual because that is how they have been told to show up even though their body is not wired in that way. 

When you learn about the blueprints, all of a sudden there is a buffet of sexual opportunities that you did not even know was available because it is not just about penetrative sex. You may realize that different kinds of touch are sexual and sensual and there are many different realms to play in. 

Exploring our erotic blueprints with a partner or by ourselves

Laurie shares that when you take the in-depth quiz, you will see your percentages of each blueprint. Then you can start to test them out. She shares that you can test them on your body through different touch. You do not need to have a partner to play with these blueprints. As long as you have a safe space without pressure or the need for performance. 

The sex communication checklist

There is a tool that Laurie uses called the sex communication checklist. It has all of these different ways of having sex in each one of the blueprints. There are 3 columns which are: willing to, want to, and don’t want to. You can use this on a first or second date depending on where you are at with someone so you can know where you align sexually. 

How to meet a partner in a blueprint – there is no sacrificing needed

Laurie shares that she and her partner are on opposite ends of the spectrum. They had to figure out a way to connect in other blueprints. Where they met was in the sensual blueprint. They were both pretty high in sensual and they found the common ground. They both love healthy food, soft sheets, and great ambiance. They met in the softer touch, in the nongential focus touch, and then from there they were able to create another sexual playground. 

If none of your blueprints overlay, you can use the sex communication checklist and then find other things that you are both willing and want to do. Laurie reminds us that we do not have to sacrifice. We can have what we want as long as we have a partner who is willing to do it with us or will allow us to experiment on our own. She also reminds us that there are many different types of relationship styles out there – monogamy is not the only way.  Celeste shares that we all deserve to be sexually happy no matter what that looks like. 

The stigma around sexual satisfaction

Celeste was watching a dating show and one of the women on there said that she has never been sexually satisfied. She was always told she was too much and that she had to be less. This can bring about a lot of shame and you start to feel like something is wrong with you. Laurie shares that when she dealt with this shame, she realized she could not orgasm because her body was not ready for it. Everyone is meant to enjoy sex and unfortunately, many women do not know how their bodies work because we were not taught this. Many women need foreplay, extra time for blood flow to get there, and for our bodies and minds to get turned on. 

We need to discover how our bodies work and that is also how the erotic blueprints can help you. Self-pleasure is really important and we have to remember that all of this is not about the end goal. If we take our time and pleasure ourselves, then that will be the way we show up for a partner and we can have a better sex life. We need to rewrite our brains to accept pleasure.

Healthy sex education and the erotic blueprints

Sex education within our society is pretty non-existent. There are some open-minded states but unfortunately, that is not how every state is. Many women have the sexual blueprint and they are not allowed to openly and freely express themselves because then they will be called a lot of nasty names. What is great about the blueprints is that everyone is celebrated for who they are. We need to reeducate ourselves to know that pleasure matters and there is a place for joy, love, and enjoyment. Laurie reminds us that there is nothing wrong with any of us, we are not broken and do not need fixing.

About the erotic blueprint breakthrough program

Laurie shares that there is an entire Erotic Blueprint program. It has eight modules where you go through the stages of sexuality, find your blueprint, see your obstacles and pathways to pleasure, and ultimately how you can create hot juicy sex. This is a journey of self-discovery as you learn about anatomy, and communication skills. It is a self-study course where you can take it on your own or have a coach like Laurie walk you through this. This program is completely holistic and encompasses everything. 

Laurie’s favorite date

Laurie reminds us that if we want to keep our relationships alive, do fun stuff and do it often! There is something called the passion trifecta and if you have a fun date idea, make sure you add in mystery, obstacle, novelty, or naughtiness. Her favorite date was with her partner and she planned for them to go to a small town in California. She booked everything, they drove separately and he had to find her. Everything that she had planned was a mystery to him and the obstacle was trying to find her. Then, they pretended that they did not know each other so that added the novelty. 

Connect with Laurie:

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